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Crafting Better Tools
By lindamuralidharan on 2013-12-13 08:42:43
[caption id="attachment_5309" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Will it
always be a toy?[/caption] [caption id="attachment_5310" align="alignright" width="300"]
= 52 ome we
To head[/caption] Recently we learned that a former Democratic candidate
for Virginia governor had been stabbed by his son. He was hospitalized, and now we learn that he is out of danger and in the
process of recovery. Creigh Deeds ran for governor (his campaign failed in opposition to right wing Republican candidate
Bob MacDonnell) on a platform that included opposition to gun safety laws. It was stated his son, Gus Deeds, spent time
helping his father with his campaign. The son had been taken the day before the attempted murder/suicide to a psychiatric
facility for evaluation. There the staff determined he was a danger to himself or others and needed to be hospitalized.
Unfortunately, the staff claimed it could find no bed available in that region of Virginia to take Gus as a patient so it seems
he returned to the parental home (he was 24 so could have had a place of his own to live under more normal circumstances)
where it was the norm to keep guns. Statistically it is known that homes that contain guns of any kind, legal or otherwise, are
more likely to see a death by gunfire than homes that have no guns kept by the residents. You would think that a man who
has held various government offices over the years would be able to read and understand these statistics. You would think
he would be especially cautious about having guns in a home where there was a person experiencing serious mental health
problems. [caption id="attachment_5312" align="alignleft" width="300"]
Gun Safety[/caption] According to some reports the father had tried over many years to “help” his son, and the son seems
to have had trouble staying enrolled consistently at his chosen college, The College of William and Mary. The presumption
from these reports is that Gus had a history of showing symptoms of mental illness. Why is there nothing that I have seen in
the major news outlets about a gun death (after the initial reports) that could have very likely been prevented? Why is there
nothing questioning the judgment of this father...or mother or sisters? Why don’t we hear about whether this politician
voted for or against the huge cut backs in mental health services in recent years? Yes, can you believe it? After the Virginia
Tech mass killings and all the attendant publicity and comments about the shooter’s need for mental health treatment,
Virginia cut , rather than increased, its available services. I am judging the latter by news reports that came out at the time of
the shooting. A few minor journals have had brief follow up stories and Fox News reported on a critique of the mental health
system. So we hear so little because the victims here are white? Do we hear so little because they are among the elite,
unlike Trayvon Martin or the recent young people killed trying to get help from local residents after experiencing car
accidents? Are poor or working class folks fair game for having their lives laid out before the public when they are
victims? We learned about Trayvon Martin’s friends and families and school experiences and minor behavioral problems.
Trayvon was a victim who was portrayed by some as a perpetrator. Why has the national media been basically silent (correct
me if others have seen or read recent material that I have missed) since the day or two of and right after the events in the
Deeds home???? Parents of mentally disturbed offspring often suffer great agony trying to figure out what to do for their
family member...out of love or out of fear for loss of face in the community or out of fear of some damage the ill person
may commit. I realize that such families are up against a lot of challenges in getting appropriate health care not the least of
which is poor funding for services. Challenges are also presented by differing local and state laws and by staff people who
are themselves not so competent as we need them to be. We are still learning much about the human mind and sometimes we
go about it in too much of an abstract, academic way without involving interaction with the humans involved. However,
there are situations in which the family can do almost nothing if the ill person refuses any useful help or treatment. In all
cases, the family is going to be best served by seeking out support groups whether similar to Al Anon (many folks today
abuse mood altering substances in addition to suffering from debilitating symptoms of mental illness) or NAMI (National
Association for the Mentally Ill). Both of these organizations have chapters in almost every American community. The
brute fact is that sometimes there is absolutely nothing to be done for the ill person except that the family learn more about
the disease and learn how to take care of themselves and learn to do nothing that makes the disease worse. Yes, sometimes
when we find ourselves helpless, totally unable to make the situation better, we still may have the power to trigger more
symptoms by our own poor choices of words or actions. It is not wise in cases where symptoms are extreme or the ill person
is unwilling to engage in treatment for the family to try to care for the ill person at home. Lay people simply do not have the
skills and training and are all too likely to provoke some kind of emotional conflict with the person close to them. In
another situation, we see the keeping of an ill person at home ending very badly. For example, people are beginning to hint
at the idea that Adam Lanza’s mother herself needed help. Not to mention the obviously worsening condition of Adam
himself. Some reports said that earlier in his life when the mother placed Adam in some kinds of school or other programs
that were designed for his special needs, the mother soon after pulled him out because she thought she knew better than the
professionals. It is true that all of us have to question providers of any services and sometimes we do know better than a
given provider (whether dentist or psychiatrist), but the issue with Nancy Lanza is that she exhibited a pattern over time that
did not serve her or Adam well. The fact that she tried to take care of him at home long after he was out of public school age
illustrates a mistake that too many families make. The available information suggests that Ms Lanza had severe control
issues. Controlling behavior can contribute to the triggering of symptoms of some forms of mental illness. Sometimes it is
just not feasible to have a mentally ill adult cared for at the parental (or often grandparents’) home. And if the family still
chooses to be one of the primary care givers, they need to have a lot of training and support from peer groups (other families
experiencing similar difficulties.) It is fortunate indeed that Gus’s father was not lethally injured. And, yes, many in the
public will jump to the conclusion that the man has suffered enough by being nearly fatally killed and losing a son.
However, this is no longer the type of thing that can be looked at as a private matter. The man is a politician and we need to
know what his role has been in providing or limiting mental health treatment. We already know that he has been part of the
segment of our population that thinks guns do more good than harm even though you hear of only the tiniest number of folk
who backed a criminal down with a gun while innocent people are dying from gun violence every single day in this country
alone. We know that the gun manufacturers are working very effectively to convince law makers that any limit whatsoever
to pistols and rifles and assault type weapons would mean the end of the freedom to bear arms in this country. The absurdity
of that is hard to explain, and it is amazing that more folks don’t just notice that this is a clear conflict of interest. The
people who profit from making guns are the supposedly making rational arguments about why we should have ever more of
them in our midst. Do car makers want us to buy more cars or learn how to keep our older ones running longer? It has been
said over and over...I wish the politicians would open their ears or their boxes of courage and integrity....that the Second
Amendment can easily be complied with if we establish a legal and social climate where folks continue to have and buy
guns only so long as they follow a number of sensible conditions and limitations. Of course, none of the suggested safety
regulations are cut and dried. E.g. some day I might be diagnosed as depressed or even as having some symptoms of
schizophrenia. If I am in treatment, take any useful medications, and have never shown any indication that my symptoms
involved thoughts of violence, perhaps I ought to have the right to buy a gun. However, folks who have been treated for or
accused of certain kinds of very problematic behaviors in the last five years probably ought to be banned from gun
ownership until and unless the person shows she is in treatment and symptom free for two years or more. Thus we need to
have safer gun laws that are carefully thought out and that could be expected to work together as a system that reduces
violence and promotes safety but cannot be viewed as any kind of panacea to stop all killing. I also have a personal bias. I
see guns as needed for the most part only for sports similar to target shooting and legal animal hunting and for security and
law enforcement people who need the weapons on duty. I would personally go even farther...as most cities ban the
keeping of horses so horses are generally boarded in rural areas...I would require guns to be locked in secure facilities near
gun ranges or the like...I know that is something that will not fly with the paranoid, but I do believe we can reach a point
where there are a lot more gun safety laws on the books than at present. Again my concern is that we are not evening talking
about the issues raised by the horrible events in the Deeds family. We need to continue a public dialogue on this incident as
well as on the mass shooting incidents of recent years.
GUNS
We defend our President
We defend our Congressmen
We defend our Governors
We defend our celebrities
We defend our sporting events with guns
We defend our jewelry stores with guns
We defend our banks -with guns
We defend our office buildings with guns
We defend our factories with guns
We defend our courts---------------------------with guns
We defend our children with a sign that reads:
“THIS IS A GUN FREE ZONE."
«and then call someone with a gun if there's an emergency.
Some of you have read my usual comments
about totally avoidable gun violence. As presently glorified and proliferated, guns are seen as tools to solve problems. Gus
definitely used a gun (whether his or his father’s) to effectively solve his problem. He is not suffering unbearable emotional
pain any longer. A knife has many uses other than for killing or injuring, but here we can see that a knife was a weapon
(tool)....to express the son's anger and pain toward his father .... But it proved less effective in killing than the gun did. In
this case. For that we can be thankful. I believe in many less lethal tools to solve our personal and social problems. From
infancy to adulthood I hope we begin to teach the use of many nonviolent problem solving tools. [caption
id="attachment_5326" align="aligncenter" width="600"]
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And another perspective on
"Mental Health and Gun Control" that I just couldn't resist adding after the discussion in comments so far! Added by Mickie
Lynn. Credit: Mike Smith, Las Vegas Sun[/caption]
